Stephen King wrote a great piece on all the dreams and ambitions you can have when you're young in the introduction to The Gunslinger. When considering how unrealistic these things are, he asked: "If you don't start out too big for your britches, how are you gonna fill 'em when you grow up?"
When you're young you set yourself goals and you give yourself ideals but as you get older the goals start to seem more unattainable and the ideals are lost to the struggles of the real world. It is my understanding that few lives go according to their original plans. More commonly people wake up one morning in their late thirties and realise "Wow, this is my life." When you do wake up that morning with the memories of the dreams you once had and the ideals that were bargained away, it is the person you wake up to and all the other people in your life who make the sacrifices worthwhile.
When you accept the fact you will never play for a professional sports team, never star in the film which defines your generation and occasionally vote for a political party who sit so far away from the left that the eighteen year old version of you would cry, it is the relationships you have with people that will get you through. Your friends, your partner, your children and your siblings will be the people to let you know, while you never set the world alight, you honestly improved their lives.
While part of me will always hang onto the dream of owning the last successful independent record store in London, I know it will probably never happen. What makes that knowledge bearable is an image I have. An image of sitting at a dinner table on a Saturday night after a stressful week with a drink in hand. I'll look around the table and see the wife I love, the friends I have had for decades and the children I am proud of. On that night I will think to myself "Fuck (because my vocabulary won't have improved). I made it, my life is awesome."
Stephen King is right, aim high when you're young, aim for the impossible. If you're mighty enough you might even make it happen but if not, the place you find yourself when you're lost will still be pretty incredible and the people who are there with you will be the people you love (as long as you're not a douche pirate).
My next blog will be called In Defence of the Genre: Top 5 Romantic Comedy Films to celebrate the release of Friends with Benefits, which looks pretty funny and just all round pretty.
